Weakness

As a massage therapist I am known primarily for my strength and intuitive touch. Needless to say, it's a bit frightening when both of these have been damaged. Prior to the surgery I had no pain, but instead felt a consistent numbness or tingly feeling in my middle three fingers. I am so thankful that there has never been any pain, but the numbness initially provided a barrier between my clients and myself. Over the three months before surgery I came to rely on the feeling in the palm of my hands for sensing the differences in muscle tissue, levels of heat in the body and energy levels. But I still had my strength in my hands. Now it seems to be gone. I know it's temporary and that I only had surgery last week, but I've been sitting here with my water bottled in front of me for two days, unable to open it to change the water inside.

The ability to open the jar of peanut butter, squeeze the lemon for juice or get myself up from a seated position on the floor has been greatly diminished. I have always relied on my strength and now it is failing me. Luckily, I start OT next Monday and assume that most if not all of my strength will return with daily exercise and patience. I guess the most important word is patience.